Danielle LaPorte is one of those people who makes you happy to be alive, you know? To celebrate living and being in truth, integrity and honour.
If you don’t know her (yet), she is (among many things) the creator of whitehottruth.com (a resource I devour heartily), author, speaker and commentator on the national CBC TV show, Connect With Mark Kelley. And oh so much more.
I’ve joyously connected with her several times (at her speaking engagements; a Fire Starter group in Toronto; and, an unforgettable phone session that I reflect upon frequently) and every time, I feel a touch more invincible, a bit taller and a hell of a lot more focused. She is gracious with her experience, her wisdom and her desire to help others succeed.
She hearts entrepreneurs and we heart her.
She generously (she’s like that) offered to be e-terviewed by me some time ago and, she is as much a woman of her word as she is a woman of her truth.
The Quintessential Questions
My belief is that the disconnect between truth and lies that we tell ourselves is the basic difference between holding oneself back and holding oneself higher...whether we're listening to our own truths or our own lies. You write about white hot truths…in the most sublime fashion. And I'm curious:
What was a lie that you told yourself that was holding you back for a good long time (in coaching, we call these voices that like to keep us safe and small "saboteurs")?
I used to think that I needed business partners. That to really take my place as a leader, a voice, a minister of my rockin' truth would have been a bit uh, arrogant, that it was more "evolved" to be "collaborative." Of course that didn't do anybody any ultimate good. I'm a Lone Ranger, and once I owned that, I was of greater service to everyone. And I laughed a lot more. A LOT more.
Bonus points if you have a characterization of your saboteur (i.e.Nick the Nihilist who always says "no, you can't do that")
I used to have a super ego named Starshyne McBalance. In all her 80's New Age wisdom she had me repress a lot of power and pragmatism in the name of harmonic convergence and "keeping the peace."
How did you turf that mo-fo out but good?
I learned the hard way. I'd "spiritualized" (read: sugar-coated, denied, made crap behavior "understandable") so much for so long that when it all came tumbling down, it was clear that I needed to put accountability and integrity closer to the top of my "things I most value in my self and fellow humans" list. And at that point, my New Age alter ego knew she had to fend for herself. She's working in an Ashram gift store in Idaho, hiding from creditors.
What's the whitest, hottest, truth that you know?
Everything is progress.
What's the blackest, coldest, lie that most people that you meet are living?
That they're not worthy.
Do you have a physical reaction to a lie? (Note: if I feel one, in myself or one unrequited near me, I have an urge for a cigarette...so blessedly, it is rare).
When I know I'm being lied to by someone else, I get really quiet, like a Panther. And then I decide whether I'm going to pounce or prattle off. I'm usually just stunned when people lie, it just seems so, so...antiquated and violent.
What do you BELIEVE to be true but are still working on validating?
I'm actually working on believing less. Deconstructionism. It's fun.
Is there a tension between the white hot truth-teller that you are (so gloriously) for AND the fact that you are (at your core) a self-proclaimed introvert? Please separate that collapsed distinction for us who think you must be one OR the other.
I am both and that's that. That's where I am in my life, a new place of is-ness. Okay, but to unpack it...it has helped me to find other freaks like myself to identify with, Thomas Merton for one. He was a remarkably devoted monk who craved the solitude that monastic life guaranteed. And...he loved the adulation that his essays and lectures brought. He also took liberties with a number of his vows, particularly the one about celibacy. My kinda guy.
What is the one thing that ALWAYS makes you giggle? (note: for me it's the word "fart". I am a hit with kindergartners).
My husband has this annoyingly-endearing way of kissing up to me after I just wigged out on him about something. Smoochie koochie stuff that gets me giggling every time.
There is one truth that will set us all free from our own lies. What is it, DL?
I'm going to lean on Krishnamurti for this one. "Truth is a pathless land."
Structures, and our lives and psyches are fraught with them, get between us and our knowing so often. Fewer rules. Deeper feelings.
Accountability, giggliness, integrity, feeling, honesty, ambition, love, generosity, kindness, progress…these words make my heart sing. See why I dig this woman so much? You will too...just go and find her: