When I transferred from my old web site to my new (still shiny) site, I lost all of my emails. Every…last…one. Let me repeat: Every…last…one. After doing what every self-respecting Gen-X’er would do (going on Facebook to wittily bemoan my situation, which oddly enough, didn’t resolve the problem), I moved through the grieving process pretty quickly (am getting good at this):
Denial – No no, I’m sure it’s all still there. Let me close and open Outlook five to 25 more times…that oughta bring them back.
Anger – “Hello domain host provider…please tell me why my complete inbox has vanished and your explanation had better not start with ‘we told you to back everything up before your domain changeover’ because I am a woman on the verge here…oh no you didn’t just say that…let me speak to your supervisor… (note to self: be careful of this tendency to haul off on poor customer service reps…karma is a strange and powerful force)
Bargaining – Ok ok…if I don’t have the emails in my inbox, at LEAST let my sent emails be there….AAAACK (and back up to denial for a visit)
Depression – No words here…just the sound of me hitting the Hallowe’en candy but hard
Acceptance – I guess they’re all really gone. For good. Sigh.
Here’s where I thrive….it’s after acceptance. It’s my stage 6.
The reframe – Wow. Empty inbox. Huh. No more flagged important emails. I wonder how important they really were. Chances are, if I didn’t tend to them right away, they probably weren’t going to alter the course of anyone’s life. I literally have no one to answer to right now. This feels kinda nice. Freeing. Expansive. Spacious. Maybe I’ll make those calls I’ve been meaning to make…
Not bad for an hour and a half’s work of self-talk, eh?
I love nothing more than a good ol’ fashioned reframe…and let me be clear about what a reframe is NOT. It is NOT rooted in some type of Pollyana-esque eternal optimism, which can be painful to behold in large amounts (though a healthy dose of that never hurt anyone).
No, it’s actually deeply rooted in one magnificent trait: Curiosity. If this is a weak muscle for you, give it a stretch…especially if you fancy yourself an entrepreneur….you’ll need it.
It is quite simple and goes something like this:
“I wonder what’s available to me now?”
Want to give it a whirl? Some scenarios for you to try it out with:
- Your boss wants to move you out of marketing and into sales. You hate sales.
- Your business partner decides the new joint venture won’t work for her.
- The book that lives in your heart simply can’t seem to find its way on to the pages. You are starting to think about scrapping the whole idea.
I see glorious possibility in all of these situations…if it’s hard for you, give me a call. We will find what is newly available, right and resonant for you…and move you into action.