To avoid feeling like a fraud, the Impostor Complex has us hide out in certain behaviours: procrastination, diminishment, comparison, leaky boundaries, people-pleasing, or in your case: PERFECTIONISM.
So, say you are invited to speak at a national conference. Your natural and innate desire to do a good job and honour your hosts and the attending guests is serving you well. Heck, it’s what won you the gig in the first place. But all along you suspect that you’re a fraud. And so, to prove your “worth” you dig in with over-preparing, refining, polishing, perfecting. You try to learn EVERYTHING (and I mean EVERYTHING) about the subject matter lest anyone find you out. It’s never enough. You think about canceling (a LOT). You become anxious and exhausted and it’s all too much.
And in truth? You don’t feel like you’ll ever be able to do a good enough job. But you push through and finally get on that stage. You do a good job. A FINE job. But not a perfect job… how could you? A) There is no such thing. B) Your stressing and sweating and fretting was showing. You see the other speakers - so calm, so poised. And then you think: a-HA! They are the real pros. Me? If I were a real pro I wouldn’t have had to work so damned hard to just pull off “okay”.
I have so much more to share with you, so if you’d like to learn more, pop your email in here. I’ll share:
- Why you do this (psst… it’s not all bad!);
- How it relates to the Impostor Complex and has been in the way of your Unshakeable Confidence; and,
- Above all, what you can do to move past this so you can shine even brighter. Because we neeeeeed you at full strength.