Lie of the Imposter Complex #1: Your Self-Doubt is Proof of Your Inadequacy
The Imposter Complex has three objectives:
So, it’s no coincidence that Lie #1 of the 12 Lies of the Imposter Complex is that your self-doubt is proof of your inadequacy.
(By the way, here’s why I say Imposter Complex instead of Imposter Syndrome).
It’s one of the Imposter Complex’s oldest refrains…
If you doubt yourself, how can anyone else trust in you?
How can you lead and serve others when you're full of self-doubt?
In fact, as far back as 1978, when Clinical Psychologists Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes were studying the Imposter Phenomenon at Oberlin College in Ohio, they noticed that at its most basic:
“Despite outstanding academic and professional accomplishments, women who experience the impostor phenomenon persist in believing that they are really not bright and have fooled anyone who thinks otherwise. Numerous achievements, which one might expect to provide ample objective evidence of superior intellectual functioning, do not appear to affect the imposter belief.” The imposter phenomenon in high achieving women: Dynamics and therapeutic intervention. (Emphasis mine.)
In other words, folks who suffer from the Imposter Complex have an innate tendency to doubt their capacity — and use it as concrete proof of their inadequacy.
But the very fact that you’re experiencing the Imposter Complex in the first place is proof that you are conscientious, high-functioning, and have strong values of integrity and excellence. Honestly; high-achievers are statistically much more likely to experience the Imposter Complex.
It’s also often a byproduct of the world and culture we live in that certain folks doubt themselves because they have been taught to do so.
This is conditioning, but it can be overcome.
How that self-doubt as proof might manifest
Depending on which of the six behavioural traits of the Imposter Complex you most often experience, you might experience the self-doubt of Lie #1 a little differently:
If you’re a people-pleaser, it’s pretty much a given that you will discount the praise of others, when they tell you you’ve done a good job, or when they invite you to step up and lead. They’re just being nice, after all. (No...actually, they’re not.)
If you have leaky boundaries, you may shelve what you think you know, what you THINK you are capable of, in favour of others’ perspectives, which erodes your confidence in your knowing even more.
If you tend to compare, you know all you’ve done will never quite stack up to what others have done. Or you may despair that you’ll never be capable of what you see others doing.
If you’re a perfectionist, anything you’ve already achieved will never quite stack up to your impossibly high standards of what you OUGHT to be capable of.
If you’re a procrastinator, every second you spend not doing the thing erodes your confidence in your ability to do the thing in the first place.
If you tend to diminish, welp… doubting your capacity, or at least DIMINISHING your capacity is the name of the game. You don’t want to shine too bright, or you’ll be cut down.
No matter which behavioural trait is keeping your belief about your capacity at bay, the best and only way to wriggle free is by deepening into the TRUTH: that self-doubt is proof of your humanity, not your inadequacy.
Self-doubt is proof of your humanity.
Not your inadequacy.
Flip self-doubt on its head
Although it’s easy to see these lies as only negatives, holding us back, there is a bright side.
This doubt you experience? Keeps you on your edge, striving for mastery. And that is what MAKES you a good leader.
Your standards and expectations of yourself are realllllllly high. And though you won’t admit it to many people, you want to be THE BEST at everything you do.
But that’s how you will create your impeccable impact.
You just need to gather some tools to help you root into the truth about your abilities.
Even more great news: they exist.
Start with my free training on the Five ICONIC shifts leaders use to overcome Imposter Complex. and I guarantee you’ll find yourself nodding and “aha!”-ing at at least one of them.
Stick it in your toolbox. Bring it out the next time you’re certain that your own self-doubt means you’re less worthy.
And remember what it really is: All lies.
Click here for my free training:
Five ICONIC shifts leaders use to overcome Imposter Complex.