Articles
From colicky baby to SALSA BABIES!!!
Years ago, while on maternity leave, I read in a parenting journal about the mompreneur phenom, Jennifer Torres, Founder of Salsa Babies.
Back then, I was a budding entrepreneur myself. I recall reading that this powerhouse of a woman started her company with the purpose of staying home with her kids after her maternity benefits had ended and that her intention was to generate the same revenue that she was receiving from EI. No more, but certainly, no less.
I too, wanted to stay home with my daughter and also develop a business. When I read those simple parameters, it seemed viable and …inspirationally… attainable. I felt moved to set the same goal for myself.
Our paths have crossed a couple of times over the past year, and I’ve always wanted to hear more about her. Yesterday, we shared an hour of great conversation about business, balance, goals, dreams, and why folding underwear is a time suck. She is every bit as vibrant, dynamic, energetic and warm as you’ve imagined. And she has it together.
I was hooked the moment she uttered her opening remark:
I’ve learned to follow what interests you and what you’ve loved doing throughout your life.
Bingo.
Her story
Check out my free training on the 5 Shifts Our Clients Use to Overcome the Imposter Complex and Grow their Income and their Impact
Where I pull back the curtain on five shifts to start raising voices, rates, and hands all while being the kind, congruent, and authentic leader I know you to be.
The halcyon eve of summer vacation
Today is our daughter’s first last day of school. She’s finishing out junior kindergarten with a glowing report card (if you don’t count the pointed comment: “she usually follows instructions well”).
At five years old, she has a lifetime of firsts ahead of her (though this is the first significant “last”…a point I find intriguing). Some firsts are good: home runs and kisses, and some bad: broken bones and heart. It all leads to a rich life and I am so excited for her.
But today, I want time to stand still for her. Being in the school halls today, I felt the energetic buzz that I remember so very well from my own childhood. The anticipation of a long summer of swimming, lemonade stands, playing tennis, giggling with pals in the treehouse, eating watermelon and watching ants do their thing. The hard truth always became apparent around week three as boredom set in (though in my house, if we whined about being bored, we were met with our least favourite axiom: “only the boring are bored”). The anticipation always seemed more satisfying than the reality. Disappointment 101: things aren’t always as blissful as they “ought to be”.
I wonder about this phenomenon and how it has come to impact our adult existence. When I work with my coaching clients and they are close to attaining their stated goals or objectives, some opt to retreat by putting up barrier after barrier. Why would they stop themselves short? I wonder if it has something to do with the fear that when the brass ring is reached, that it will feel flimsy and disappointing. A hope dashed. So…we often “protect” ourselves from this by keeping our sights set low and not allowing ourselves to think big. Because the higher the mountain the longer the fall. Makes sense, right? Why climb higher when disappointment’s possible...or heck, in some people's minds...imminent?
So, further to this, I try to imagine my daughter this time next year, ambivalent about upcoming summer vacation…because she’s “wiser” now and knows that after three weeks, the idea of a popsicle at 9 AM will have lost its appeal. But try as I might, it’s blissfully impossible to envision. Kids are smarter than that. Fun can always be had. Annoying as it was, being challenged with not being “boring” made my sister, friends and I dig a little deeper into the recesses of our creativity and we always got a little more lost in a new world of fun and creativity.
Do you want to go through life ambivalent about things and spend your time counting down days on vacation until school starts again, or do you want how to make getting to the brass ring more exciting…and have a popsicle while you’re at it?
And while I hope my daughter lives a life of asking herself those probing questions, I do so wish she could hang on to today…
Check out my free training on the 5 Shifts Our Clients Use to Overcome the Imposter Complex and Grow their Income and their Impact
Where I pull back the curtain on five shifts to start raising voices, rates, and hands all while being the kind, congruent, and authentic leader I know you to be.
The weisurely way
New term alert…“weisure”. Well, it may not be new to you…I JUST realized that “yard sale” was the new “gong show”. In any case, it references the blurring of the line between work and leisure. Clever…even if it does sound like a slacker band name. I came across an article on CNN about the phenomenon. It reads:
Many who haven't already abandoned the 9-to-5 workday for the 24-7 life of weisure probably will do so soon, according to New York University sociologist Dalton Conley, who coined the word. It's the next step in the evolving work-life culture.
Am really not sure what to make of this. Intuitively, I believe *strongly* that work and leisure should be very well separated. However, I am “guilty” of checking my BlackBerry during play time with my daughter, and dabbling on Facebook when I should be doing accounting.
The article points out that this reflects that work has become more fun. Work being fun = good. Ignoring my daughter for the sake of an email check = bad.
The article points to the flipside in that fun has become “work”…think social technology.
Weisure has been fueled by social networking sites like Facebook and MySpace, where "friends" may actually be business partners or work colleagues.
True true.
I’ve been tripping over “weisure” for a while now in my own life. I have a value of being present in whatever it is that I’m doing…especially what I feel very important in my life: coaching clients; playing with my daughter; practicing yoga; and, enjoying time with my husband. By allowing my thoughts (and even actions) to deviate from what I’m focused on, I feel like I’m letting myself down…as trampling on one’s values often does.
In the end (of this posting anyways), I guess I DO know what to make of this….for my own life. I’m redrawing the dividing line in the sand between my work and my leisure. I love them both too much to not be focused 100%.
Check out my free training on the 5 Shifts Our Clients Use to Overcome the Imposter Complex and Grow their Income and their Impact
Where I pull back the curtain on five shifts to start raising voices, rates, and hands all while being the kind, congruent, and authentic leader I know you to be.
When one door closes…
…it can get pretty stuffy in here. Sure, another door will open…we all know that. That’s why clichés have endured since the beginning of time. But really and truly, how much do you love being told some peppy platitude when you’re feeling kicked around?
The subject of trite clichés has come up a number of times over the past several days: in today’s Globe and Mail; in a conversation with a job-seeker who is less desperate to find work than she is to receive some MEANINGFUL input from friends and family; and finally, from a life coaching skeptic. He asked if coaching wasn’t really about “lobbing cream puffs like ‘every cloud has a silver lining’”. Ummm…sure it is…which is why it’s so effective.
Indeed, coaching is rooted in empowerment. Ergo…optimism (which is why it resonates so well with me). HOWEVER…no good coach worth his/her salt would suggest that if you’re handed a lemon that you should make lemonade. Why?
That’s called giving advice. We don’t do that. Consultants do. And it may or may not work as it may or may not be resonant with you. And besides, go ahead and try to make a living on 25 cents a glass.
What might we ask if you’ve been handed a lemon? What’s good, bad, ugly, or possible about this lemon? What’s available now that you have this lemon? Depending on the client, it could be the discovery that extract from the rind makes a wonder fertilizer for tropical plants, or perhaps it's the inspiration for a blockbuster movie....heck, it may even BE that making lemonade was an unrequited dream. And blessed be, if there’s nothing to the lemon for the client, they can choose to pitch the lemon...and what that action means to them. It’s about choice, learning and action. Not a cream puff in the mix.
So…if you really want to help a friend who’s lost a job, suffered a breakup or is generally in the dumps (oops…cliché alert), please don’t tell them to look on the bright side. If they’re important to you, feel the suckiness of their situation with them, ask how you can help (from a genuine and sincere place) and if that’s not possible, put them in touch with a life coach. I can hook you up.
Check out my free training on the 5 Shifts Our Clients Use to Overcome the Imposter Complex and Grow their Income and their Impact
Where I pull back the curtain on five shifts to start raising voices, rates, and hands all while being the kind, congruent, and authentic leader I know you to be.
Shiny happy jewellery
A couple of weeks ago, I was invited to attend the launch of SoloMag, the brainchild of Jacqueline Parker. More on that cool woman in a later blog posting. I am drawn to people who glow. Call it the law of attraction, call it what you will. As such, I was drawn to Monica Graves.
She is radiant as a baseline…but when she talks about her business, she pretty much hums. Why? Quite simply, she loves what she does. And she’s very good at it. Her company is glamjulz and she sells her stunning creations in over 100 stores across Canada.
Her Story
She started her first business at 16 painting t-shirts then moved on to painting murals but realized somewhere along the lines that these weren’t particularly lucrative. To supplement the income of her artistic pursuits, she took up some babysitting gigs. Believe it or not, that lead to an offer of work at Canada Post (time and time again…it’s who you know!). It wasn’t where she was planning on going in her career, but it certainly served a purpose. On the one hand, she recognized that she was denying her creative side, but on the other, the steady income was a toasty security blanket.
Along the way, she was offered a sales position with the organization and they encouraged her to go to business school.
Canada Post taught me about another side of myself…I already knew my artistic side pretty well. Art comes from within me and the more comfortable you are with something the easier it is to create. So for me, it’s pretty easy. Business lives on the other side of the brain and I found it was a new world of learnings.
I’m so happy that I was able to go to business school, thanks to Canada Post. If I had have pursued arts school, I’m really not sure where I’d be now.
Instead of letting the creative part of her lay dormant, she picked up the beading tools that she bought on a whim with a friend and started creating what she loved. Turns out, what she loved was what people wanted.
Before long, she had a sales person taking her creations to market and her husband was running glamjulz full-time. The pace of full days at Canada Post until 6pm and then creating stunning baubles until midnight started to take its toll on her well being.
Monica needed to take a step back and evaluate…and like all forks in the road, it was hard. On the one hand, she told herself that if she took the plunge full-time into glamjulz, she may well become the huge success that everyone around her told her she would be. On the other hand, who says no to Canada Post?
The Shift
Three years ago, pretty much out of the blue, Monica was offered a package. Even though on some level she believes she manifested the situation, she still felt the three “s’s” pretty acutely: surprised, shocked and scared. She was faced with the choice: “should I stay or should I go?” This is not a fun choice to make. Canada Post had been a grounding force in her life…and now it was slipping away.
After the offer was made, she spent some time comparing herself to those around her. Then, after some values assessment and soul-searching, she saw the situation for what it was…an opportunity. With the support of friends, family and a much bigger vision of where she wanted to go, she was able to see what was now available to her. She took the package and immersed herself fully into developing glamjulz into the going concern it is today. Her creations adorn the necks, wrists and earlobes of the likes of Fergie, Paris Hilton, Elisha Cuthbert…and after pilfering my jewellery box, my daughter too. Monica has a robust bridal consulting business and her work has been featured on shows like “Rich Bride, Poor Bride”.
I now have power and am doing what’s right for me.
Could this have all come together without the Canada Post package offered to her? Monica knows that she would have made the shift eventually. She would have found some way to make it work. Because, underneath it all, she gets the value of knowing her values. Her advice to others thinking about making the leap into a new business venture?
Know your values and rate them in priority. When things are thrown at you, you’ll know how to handle it. You also need to really believe in yourself. It’s how energy works…write your business plan like the success is already happening.
And for those people who want to make a shift but simply don’t know what that shift could be?
Go back to your childhood; tap into what excited you as a kid. Notice what it was that set you apart from everyone else. It’s knowing our differences that helps us to see who we are. Something in there is magical.
And in Monica Graves’ case, not just magical, but shiny and beautiful too.
Check out my free training on the 5 Shifts Our Clients Use to Overcome the Imposter Complex and Grow their Income and their Impact
Where I pull back the curtain on five shifts to start raising voices, rates, and hands all while being the kind, congruent, and authentic leader I know you to be.
Want to innovate but can't create?
Ever had what you thought was a brilliant idea? Ever spent a whole lot of time talking about it but not actually DOING anything about it? Ever spent so much time waiting for some sort of divine intervention that someone else bypassed you with the same idea because it was too good NOT to do? No? Well, I have. I called it a “Coffee Cuff”, which was an unclaimed name at the time. Aaaahhhh, the coffee cuff. So simple…so smart.
My husband actually came up with the idea back in 2001 on a long drive to the family cottage. “Why are coffee sleeves only intended for a single use and why can’t there be a non-disposable version?” This begat a cloth version in my mind which begat a beaded funky version (also in my mind) that people could wear as accessories. Distribution channels, market research, packaging, logos, pricing, marketing all became quite clear and crystallized (again, in my mind).
One problem…I know not thing one about sewing or beading. We bought a $300 sewing machine. I threw a piece of hemp at the machine, but low and behold, it simply wouldn’t make itself.
In the interim, I talked about the idea with anyone who would listen: Who knew what about patents? What were the market trends for coffee? How much would you be willing to pay for a coffee cuff? How would you distribute this? Who do we know at Starbucks HQ?
And still, no prototype. And then I got bored of talking about it…and the idea just kind of died away.
SHOULD you find yourself in the position of having a great idea that you want to get off the ground, you now have the luxury of living in the age of “micromanufacturing”. Create your design, upload it to a site like Ponoko, tell them what material you’d like it created in and they’ll produce it (to 1,000th-of-an-inch precision). You can then set up a store and sell it with Ponoko even taking care of credit-card billing and shipping.
Go ahead…check out “Coffee Coat”. I’m not bitter, really!
No need to cry in your latte for me. I’m wise enough to know that if I'm not moved to fight for something, there is an excellent chance it wasn’t really worth fighting for…likely because it wasn’t in sync with my values. My life purpose is less about innovative creations and more about helping people make powerful and transformative changes in their lives.
I’m right where I need to be right now.
But…if YOU are moved to innovate but lack the means to create…strike that off the list of why it can’t be done. It may not be divine intervention, but it is a kick in the butt.
Check out my free training on the 5 Shifts Our Clients Use to Overcome the Imposter Complex and Grow their Income and their Impact
Where I pull back the curtain on five shifts to start raising voices, rates, and hands all while being the kind, congruent, and authentic leader I know you to be.