If you’re seeking perfection, you’re likely missing the point.
A couple of weeks back, we hosted a family “fundue” party with some dear old friends who have become family.
We laughed and talked about travel, colonialism, and generally caught up over melted gruyère followed by panettone dipped in chocolate. It was sublime.
After our friends left, and my husband, kid and I took to cleaning up the dishes, our conversation turned to parenting.
As I handed her a dishtowel, my daughter looked me in the eye and thanked me for something I said to her when she was five.
Apparently, at that tender age, I told her that it was pretty much certain that I would mess her up, inadvertently, in ways we would never quite know until they had happened.
You can imagine the immediacy of the sucker punch I felt, right?
But I held her beautiful eyes in my gaze and asked how that had impacted her.
She said at the time it scared her. (No doubt.) But that over the years, she came to find great comfort in those words. (In fact, with gruyère still clearly on her mind, she said the words got better with age like cheese. Funniest kid.)
She came to understand that what I meant was that I was going to be WITH her nomaddawhat. That I would be entirely imperfect in my love and care and would mess things up and do reparations when needed.
Because if my intention was to be perfect as a mother, I was missing the point.
Holy shit, right?
How often have we allowed our desire for perfectionism...in ANYTHING...to make us miss the point?
Our email provider tells us that precisely 50% of you, dear readers, are in the US. Which means that maybe you are celebrating Thanksgiving, maybe you are not. But many of you will be spending time with friends and family.
My invitation to you is to choose presence over perfection.
In fact, that goes for all of us.
In all you do, today, this weekend, and as you stare down the barrel of the new decade, choose presence over perfection.
I was honoured and delighted to be invited back onto The Copywriter Club podcast. Kira and Rob are genius and brilliant at what they do, and it lead us to excellently deep waters. And APPARENTLY, I am the first person in 162 episodes to mention a sea anemone, so there’s that. I also helped Rob access his Brand of Joy...and I’m glad I did. (You can also check out my FIRST interview with them here. It’s an excellent primer.)
Last week, I interviewed Nicole Lewis-Keeber on the Ready Enough podcast. We talked about the relationship between trauma and the Imposter Complex. Because...SERIOUSLY CONNECTED. What has been resonating the most with listeners is her understanding of the understanding of our Inner Critics as being protectors of our “Inner Kiddos” and the depth of wisdom that lives there. That was a huge takeaway for me too. Would love to hear yours.
Check out my free training on the 5 Shifts Our Clients Use to Overcome the Imposter Complex and Grow their Income and their Impact
Where I pull back the curtain on five shifts to start raising voices, rates, and hands all while being the kind, congruent, and authentic leader I know you to be.