When is there still room for improvement...and when is it resistance?
I spent a great deal of time, energy, and thought discerning and devising my list of the 12 lies of the Imposter Complex.
Lies like:
Lies, all.
These lies are intended to keep you alone and isolated, doubting your capacity, and out of action because that’s where you are the most vulnerable and that’s where the Imposter Complex thrives.
(And there’s a very good reason why I say Imposter Complex instead of Imposter Syndrome).
Inevitably, however, whether I’m giving a talk to 100 people or having a one-on-one conversation with a client, a big BUT comes up…
“But… I’m really not ready yet, because I don’t know how to....”
“But…I’m afraid I’m going to get it wrong and cause harm…”
“But...I’m afraid I haven’t done enough analysis…”
“But...what if there is a better way and I haven’t figured it out yet…”
“But...there are angles I haven’t explored yet…”
Here’s the big, important TRUTH:
There's room for improvement.
Yes. yes. yes. There is room.
Which is good news for you, you high-functioning overachiever, you. On your quest for impeccability and excellence, there are plenty of new heights to reach and plenty of new depths to explore.
The moment of truth comes in the discernment: when is there truly room for improvement, and when is it the Imposter Complex talking.
Simple, not easy.
Learning to tell truth from lies
What I know for sure is that the lies of the Imposter Complex are seductive.
It can be easier, more comfortable even to believe the lies, to fall back on the behaviours that the Imposter Complex has taught you.
But the very fact that you are here, that you’re examining your relationship to the Imposter Complex, tells me that you aren’t satisfied with that status quo any longer.
It tells me that you have already started to question the veracity of those lies that echo around in your head whenever you step out, take chances, and try something new.
You're on a path for more. It's simply the nature of the ego. It wants to want more than it wants to get.
Wanting more IS your prerogative AND the very reason that you have achieved so very much already.
Once you’ve decided that you want something bigger, something more, that’s when you have to start to ask yourself:
Which parts of my resistance are lies, and which are truths?
The Lie is “I’m not ready enough….” but the truth is, sometimes there is more you need to do or learn in order to be ready — like learning a new skill or talking to an expert. But...I invite you to consider that you ARE ready enough to get started.
The Lie is “Successful people don’t experience this…” but the truth is, you are not seeing what their lived experience ACTUALLY is. Perhaps they have simply found the tools I teach and are having a faster recovery.
The Lie is “You can’t trust the praise of others…” and perhaps you have had the lived experience of being gaslit, shamed, or held down which DOES make it hard to trust people. But they aren’t YOUR people, are they? And YOUR people want you to succeed.
I experienced this myself over the last couple of years when I started to delve more deeply into the intersectionality piece to my Imposter Complex work.
Like I say in the intro to my Ready Enough with Tanya Geisler podcast: To a hammer, everything looks like a nail.
But sometimes the problem is not a nail. Sometimes it's microaggressions. Or racism. Or homophobia. Or fat-phobia. Or alcohol. Or anxiety. Or discrimination. Or systemic obstacles by patriarchal structures designed to keep women and nonbinary folx, people of colour, LGBTQI folx, and other marginalized people from climbing to the top.
As soon as I started to have these realizations, the Imposter Complex could have stopped me cold by telling me, You’re not ready to be an expert on the Imposter Complex if you can’t address aaaaaaaaallll these nuances. Immediately!
Luckily, I’m pretty seasoned at hammering back at the Imposter Complex — for myself, with my clients, my audience, and my readers — and I was able to recognize that Lie for what it was.
Which is WHY I started my podcast, Ready Enough with Tanya Geisler.
(See how meta that title is now, right??)
I realized the Truth, that I had more learning to do, and the lie that I wasn’t ready enough to keep pressing forward.
As I said: simple, not easy.
So, the big Truth here is, yes, there is always room for improvement.
And it takes practice to be able to tease out that truth from the Lies, to discern where improvement is warranted, and where the lies just want to keep you out of action.
I’ve spent my career developing tools to help make that discernment easier and more clear. It’s a process, and one I would be honoured to guide you through. If you’re interested in going deeper, click here to book a Breakthrough Call with me.
And? Be sure to pause and celebrate your success. The hard conversation, the win, the tenacity, the resilience. All of it. Celebration is what truly conditions us for MORE.
''Thank you, more please" is indeed a prayer.
You can be entirely grateful and want more.
(Preferably in that order.)
Click here for my free training:
Five ICONIC shifts leaders use to overcome Imposter Complex.